Mrs. Turkey Sandwich can be a real bitch sometimes. She had the nerve to schedule me for a physical last week. I had to go get my balls jiggled and get some blood drawn. I hate this.
I find out a day later that I have high cholesterol. THEN, later in the day, Mrs. Turkey Sandwich tells me that Turkey Sandwiches are high in cholesterol.
What!? Turkey Sandwiches are high in cholesterol?! What am I supposed to eat? Vegetables? Fuck that.
If I am going to die from Turkey Sandwiches, then so be it. I’m going down in a blaze of glory.