What Happened to my Fucking Mango Chutney?

My first job was a “bagger” at the local grocery store in Fairview Heights, IL.  Of all the jobs I have had, I think that this one made my Mom the most proud.  I guess it was because she shopped there.  She always told me that I had the uncanny knack to put just the right amount of food in one bag – not too heavy, not too light.  Nothing pissed that woman off more than a bagger who threw 45 lbs of dog food, butter, Doritos and TV Dinners in one bag.

Anyway, I have always enjoyed the pre-made Turkey Sandwiches from the grocery store deli.  Everywhere I have lived the local grocery store has put out some top notch TR’s.

In the Midwest, Schnuck’s (the grocery store I worked at) always made a very solid sandwich: smoked turkey, some provelone and a slice of lettuce.  Coincedentally, they also make these sandwiches they call “King of the Hill” that are good too, but they are not Turkey Sandwiches.

Down in TX, the HEB deli made such a solid Turkey Sandwich that I would often eat one as I was doing my grocery shopping.  I was also a frequent lunch time customer at the Alamo Heights Whole Foods where I got the Smoked Turkey with Mango Chutney – a nice fucking Sandwich.

Now I live in Denver and I am constantly looking for the next frontier in Turkey Sandwiches. Safeway offers a deli and pre-made sandwiches.  I was on a four day TR binger a couple months ago and got tangled up with a monster from the Safeway clearance bin.  I’m happy to say that I have successfully sworn them off ever since – but it’s “one day at a time” right?

A couple days ago, I realized that they also have Whole Foods here and that I could be reunited with the Smoked Turkey with Mango Chutney.  I made the trek out to Cherry Creek and battled the SUVs for a parking space – but son of a bitch – wouldn’t you know it – they don’t have Mango Chutney at this location.  Sure, they have the Smoked Turkey, the Ciabatta, and all the fixin’s, but no Mango Chutney.  I had to substitute Horseradish Sour Cream (which was actually quite tasty).

Hey, Whole Foods – I demand my Mango Chutney! 

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